Public Relations War on DVTV
The ongoing saga on DeafVideo.TV is a convoluted tale, beginning with AFA’s inception in early March, prompting Barry Sewell to accuse AFA of being an extension of DBC, which has been denied by both organizations.
This led to CherylfromMA and InsaneMisha, two prominent vloggers/commenters and strong supporters of Barry, to gradually over time, question his motives when it came to AFA and DBC. Barry’s comments increasingly turned personal and it was clear to observers that he was deliberately pushing people’s buttons to incite a reaction. CherylfromMA and InsaneMisha’s break from Barry, however, was not apparent until they attended the AFA rally against AG Bell on April 3, 2009, sending shock waves through the vlogosphere.
Afterwards, the lurkers, commenters and vloggers witnessed a vicious, tragic deterioration of Barry’s friendship with the two, particularly with CherylfromMA. One of the most stark examples of this rift is Cheryl’s video comment calling Barry a controller and a destroyer.
Despite this loss of support and friendship, Barry continued his ‘questioning’ of AFA and thier supporters, ultimately leading to more of the Signing Circle supporters to withdraw from him. Not surprisingly, AFA celebrated the defection of CherylfromMA, InsaneMisha and the others, which only led to Barry being further incited against the organization.
At this point, it seemed that AFA was winning the public relations battle on DVTV, due to Barry’s rapid loss of supporters and mass defections to AFA. Things took a twist however, when Cobi, Barry’s son created a vlog mocking AFA by using the Aflac duck commercials. That vlog can be found here.
At first, people thought it was Barry who created the vlog, but when it was revealed that it was actually his son, people were outraged. They could not believe that a fourteen year old would do this, solely on his own, as Cobi and Barry claimed. Many also viewed this as a perfect example of how prejudice comes into existence.
People at first engaged Cobi in a dialogue, particularly Ella Mae Lentz. However, this turned heated, when some of the commenters began telling Cobi that his father needed to grow up, that they found his family disgusting and so on, for allowing him to do this. One commenter even stated to Cobi that controlling parents can lead bright and mature children to kill them.
This led to some other commenters to call for a halt to this, since they felt this was bullying Cobi. The comments targeting Cobi slowly reduced after that, and Barry and Cobi remained steadfast, refusing to apologize or take down the vlog. This in turn, led to Aidan Mack creating a vlog discussing brainwashing, and in that vlog, she accused Barry of brainwashing his female followers. That vlog was then removed by Tayler, and Aidan uploaded the same vlog, only with the accusation against Barry edited out.
Aidan went on to accuse Tayler of censorship, prompting him to make this vlog, pointing out that only .09% of the vlogs, have been removed. Less than a half percent.
As things stand right now, the dispute between Barry and AFA continues with both sides pressuring Tayler to keep Aidan’s brainwashing vlog up, or to remove it. Tayler made another vlog here, discussing the pressuring emails.
Not only that, but Barry’s relentless questioning of AFA and DBC has led to public acknowledgment by Ella Mae Lentz and others that they do consider cochlear implants to be audistic. There’s a private sentiment amongst observers that this has turned into a televised Roman amphitheater, and I share that sentiment. However, I would not be surprised if someday, years from now, historians or anthropologists pieced together this saga into a documentary. On the surface, it might seem merely like a sordid public display of friendships being torn apart and personal vendettas and grievances…
But upon closer examination, one does realize that the current saga provides an unique insight into Deaf culture, deaf identity politics, audism and most of all, into the human psyche.
The Power of Twitter
The online store, Amazon.com is now embroiled in an intense controversy due to its labeling GLBT books as adult, effectively censoring these books. This tactic apparently began back in Feburary, and it wasn’t until this weekend, when Twitter bloggers took up the cause with the tag of #amazonfail, that Amazon.com declared it was a glitch and they’re supposedly investigating it now.
This kind of cyber-activism is right up the alley of the Deaf Community. We are well-versed in cyber-activism, as DeafRead’s official blog post stated. Imagine if we started to do more than just letting DeafRead link to us, but also started to link to each other’s blog posts, which would lead to our blog ranks increasing in many search engines, making us even easier to find.
Then we twittered about it with the right tags.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that DeafRead doesn’t do enough for the Deaf Community. However, if we truly want to effect social change as so many of us claim, we have to reach out beyond the borders of our community, to the masses.
Just like the GLBT community and their allies did on Twitter to take on Amazon.com and their shameful censoring of GLBT books. So what are we waiting for? *tweets*
Be Careful Of What You Wish For
It’s nearly Christmas, and I’m sure many are wishing for many things on Christmas day. When it was discovered that I was deaf as a baby, my parents wished for me to have language. Their wish came true, often to the chagrin of the adults around me.
One day Jack, the audiologist stopped by to make ear molds for us deaf preschoolers, and most of us disliked the feeling of the goop being squirted into our ears. So when we saw him, we immediately scattered. When it came to my turn, I immediately started running, my ribboned pigtails flying behind me, with my little dress whooshing with each move I made.
Janet, who was the teacher, shouted at me every time I looked back at her, “Come back here and sit down! Let Jack make your ear mold!”
I ignored her pleas and kept running. She attempted to corner me and bawl me out, failing each time. Finally on the umpteenth attempt, she grabbed me and sat me down on the chair, “Now you behave and let him do his job!”
Glaring up at Janet, the pig-tailed four year old me in a dress exclaimed, “Bullshit!“
So you see… be careful of what you wish for sometimes, because you just might get more than what you bargained for. 
ASL Used In Music Video
I came across a music video called, “Soon We’ll Be Found” that incorporates American Sign Language in it, on one of the blogs that I frequent. I had to hunt it down on YouTube, so I could link it on here and when I found it, I found this excerpt from the more info section very interesting.
“I’ve always been obsessed with the beauty of sign language,” says Sia. “The movement and expression just appears, to ignorant-hearing-me as a dance… a beautiful, emotive dance. But the real beauty is that, hidden in these perfect shapes, is communication.”
I watched the video, and I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand, it is well done, and quite gorgeous to watch. The exposure we are getting about American Sign Language is great! And I find it very commendable that Sia, the singer of this video, knows that our language is more than just a pretty sight and that it is for communication.
On the other hand, this is very typical of hearing people – making a profit off American Sign Language, while we have educators pooh poohing the merits of the language to be used with deaf children. And this leads to the question of whether this could lead to the trivialization of our language? To be used in music videos and artistic endeavors and not be taken seriously for deaf children in education?
To me this is definitely progress – but in which direction? Trivialization or true acceptance?
I guess only time will tell…
Call to Arms – Lying To Ourselves?
Deaf Education. That word carries so much meaning and controversy. A ideological war has been waged over Deaf Education for the past two hundred years. Now, I am seeing people call for arms for deaf children and babies to be given the right to access American Sign Language so that they may receive the opportunity to a good education.
By no means am I opposed to that. I am heartened to see the increasing exchange of knowledge and a growing maturity on our part. We are starting to come into our own and ensure our right to American Sign Language.
What puzzles me however, is that despite the call to arms for American Sign Language in Deaf Education, there is an eerie silence regarding North Carolina School of the Deaf. Initially there wasn’t enough information for me to throw in my support one way or another. But now, I feel that there is enough information for myself and others in the Deaf Community to support the students, parents and staff of NCSD.
Yet, I see no wide outcry of support for NCSD. I see no organizations of and for the Deaf coming in to help the students, staff and parents of NCSD. This leaves me with some difficult questions in my mind. Why is there such a loud silence? Is it because people know picketing at NCSD won’t work and they rather just picket, and nothing more?
A call to arms to me, means doing everything possible under the sun. Documenting what happens, damned the ire of others. Being not anonymous. Dealing with personal confrontations professionally and documenting it afterwards. Organizing with like-minded individuals who share your concerns and pooling together the documents. Speaking with the government about what’s going on and showing them the evidence. Helping others learn those tools. Giving support to others who need it.
It’s not glamorous. It’s not easy. It’s not something that will land you on the front page of the newspapers immediately. It’s not gonna get you on national news because there’s almost no opportunity for you to make yourself a martyr.
But the fight at NCSD and similar places goes at the core of what matters in Deaf Education. That is where the trenches are at. That is where the battles are won, and ultimately, the war. Where are we? Why are the trenches empty?
Boycotting of AG Bell!
I was just told today from a reputable source that a quite few parents who have CI children have resigned from AG Bell or will not renew their membership, because of the organization’s letter to Pepsi. I applaud those parents for taking a stand against intolerance.
This should serve as an example for all of us. If an organization expresses intolerance like AG Bell did, be prepared to deal with the consequences such as members withdrawing from your organization, and the community boycotting you and your donors.
Jay Krieger in his vlog listed the donors of AG Bell and I applaud him for taking the initiative for doing that. It’s about time we do this appropriately such as investigations and such. If you want to make a loud statement, pun intended, stop being consumers of AG Bell donors and tell them why you are no longer their consumers.
Or you can politely discuss with those donors on why they donated money with AG Bell and request civilly that they stop donating money to an organization that practices intolerance.
It is important for us to remain civil and polite in this process. Remember, people quit AG Bell because they were not. So, let’s take our money elsewhere and invest in companies that are tolerant and care about us and do it with class and dignity!
And by the way, Seek Geo can help you switch pager service providers! 
UPDATE: NAD HAS RESPONDED TO AGBELL. http://blogs.nad.org/president/?p=14
We *Are* Effecting Change
Amidst the uproar over the AG Bell’s letter to Pepsi, I thought it was worthwhile to recognize that we are making a difference for the better and celebrate that. We have more than two oral/CI deaf individuals learning American Sign Language, thanks to the DeafRead vlogs and blogs.
They are: Kim of Living The Questions, Val of Tales from a CI Gal, Abbie of Chronicles of A Bionic Woman
Then we have Jodi, a hearing mother of a deaf CI child, learning Italian Sign Language (LIS). In her blog she directly acknowledged us on DeafRead for prompting her to learn the language.
And lest people think all deaf oralists support AG Bell’s letter to Pepsi – they do not. Meryl of Bionic Ear Blog wrote an entry opposing the letter.
That shows the power of our vlogs and blogs. We are making a difference. People are listening to us and even taking up our languages.
If we want to make a greater impact and effect change even more, then I encourage all of you to join NAD and donate money to the organization. With our individual knowledge, words and money put together, we will inspire others to discover the truth about our culture and language. ASL and our culture will be brought into the light, despite AG Bell.
Update: Another person is learning ASL! Jennifer, a deaf CI user of Surround Sound left a comment below, stating she too is learning ASL, thanks to DeafRead.
Table of Contents
“Mom’s Gone Fighting The Deaf Wars” – Epilogue
Please read the final chapter before reading this.
I went to Gallaudet and RIT, but due to various reasons, mainly because of physical health reasons, I had to drop out. I studied psychology extensively, searching for answers that would bring me true closure. While I gained a deeper and clearer insight in the psyche, I was never able to get complete answers to why Ms. Marr and the other staff behaved the way they did.
I also read a ton of self-help books, searching for answers about myself. I was told constantly that most interpreters didn’t want to work with me, because I was horrible to them, and all kinds of crap. I didn’t have a good self-concept, but I knew that I wasn’t a horrible person. So I read nearly any psychology books I could get my hands on. And I wrote. Writing was the balm for my wounds.
When I began my second year at a community college after Gallaudet and RIT, I had a meeting with my advisor. As she searched through a desk for paper, she suddenly stopped and looked up at me. Through the interpreter, she said to me, “You know JJ, you’re not like the other deaf students here at CC. I have had not one complaint about you from the interpreters.”
My interpreter, who was also my friend, interjected (with my permission), “Yeah! I was just telling JJ that! I was telling her that all of the interpreters practically fight to interpret for her!”
I smiled then after a pause, I said, “Tell that to Northview for me, will you?”
Anne, my advisor fell silent for a moment then said, “Yeah. I heard about your situation with Northview. I never understood that.”
The interpreter said, “Well I dunno. Maybe it was because you, JJ were a smart aleck. I mean, in Ethics class she’s always jumping in and tearing apart other students’ arguments. It’s sooooo fun to interpret for! Voicing for her a mile per minute! So maybe the high school staff felt they had to ‘calm down’ you?”
I shook my head with a smirk. My interpreter knew bits and pieces of the story, but she really did not have any clue of what happened. Still smirking, I looked up and said, “That’s right. I’m horrible! I’m a smart ass! After all, I’m the Deaf Community Hitman! Yeaaaaaah!”
They burst out in body-convulsing laughter. With a smile, I retrieved the paper and walked away with the interpreter in tow.
Several feet away, the interpreter paused, then looked over her shoulder. She looked at me with a slight smile, “I can still hear Anne laughing.”
I smiled back at her and thought to myself, “Good… Leave them smiling at the very least.” As I looked away, I suddenly realized that I hadn’t had the nightmares about math since I began at the community college. My smile grew wider then I said, “Come on. We’re gonna be late for class.”
I graduated from the community college with a general A.A. degree and now am attending an university to complete my Bachelor of Science in Public and Nonprofit Administration. The nightmares never returned.
Deb Mills, to the best of my knowledge, remains teaching preschool at Northview. I saw her a few times over the years, and she never was able to look directly at me.
Sherri Ermatinger remains at Northview, interpreting. She now holds a QA rating. Mom ran into her once and Sherri told her, “I just wanted to say that you were right. I was not qualified to interpret for your daughter back then. But now I realize that I was not. Anita had told us that you hated all of us interpreters and all kinds of things, and I believed her. I’m sorry about what happened.”
Joan Esch left Northview several years later after my graduation to raise her children. She, like Deb, was never able to look at me in the face.
Ms. Kalsbeek still teaches at Northview, and I see her once in a while – always a pleasant encounter.
Ms. Marr went back to Maine to be with her family and is still interpreting to this day. Through a mutual friend, she asked for permission to email me. I declined and haven’t heard from her again.
Duane Kiley packed up his office on the last day of the school year and left. He told Mom when she wrote that last letter of complaint, that she was right and that he could not sleep at night. I hope he can sleep at night now.
Anita Siciliano retired from Northview several years ago, and has never been seen in the Deaf Community since.
John LaSotta, the superintendent who lost his job over the hearing and appeal, committed suicide during my senior year in high school. There was a suicide note, but it was never disclosed to the public.
Doreen Mangrum was demoted and works in another school district. Like the other two, she was never able to look directly at me. Years later, Mom would receive an envelope from her. She and Mom had an argument once about Mom giving her my social security number, and Mom refused.
In that envelope from Doreen, was a cut out newspaper article about a scandal that hit the public schools somewhere in Michigan. A school employee was caught stealing other employee and students’ social security numbers. Along with that cut out article was a post-it note, which simply read: You were right. – Doreen
Northview now has a deaf supervisor running the Total Communications program. The majority of teachers now sign far better, and all of the interpreters, to the best of my knowledge, have a QA rating.
As for Mom, she’s still fighting the Deaf Wars.
After the settlement, Kary hired Mom to work for him. He told her that she had wrote the best complaints he ever saw in his legal career. When she doesn’t work for Kary, she still advocates on behalf of deaf and hard of hearing children, and refuses payment from the parents.
Mom’s now a member of the Division of Deafness and Hard of Hearing Advisory Council, and has successfully advocated for over a hundred deaf/hoh children, including transferring over forty students to Michigan School of the Deaf.
She also won the Advocate of the Year award in Dearborn a few years ago, and she wrote a paper for Gallaudet about IDEA, which can be found on the American Society for Deaf Children’s website.
She was also instrumental in the formulation of the interpreter bill which I blogged about a while ago, and she is part of the core referent group to revise and reform the special education rules regarding deaf and hard of hearing children.
As the years go by, Mom’s caseload grows lighter and lighter, but I don’t anticipate her stopping her advocacy completely anytime soon. When she’s not advocating, she keeps busy by teaching American Sign Language at the local colleges, and being just a mom to me and my siblings because after all, like she said to me once during an argument, “I don’t care if you’re an adult now. You’re still my baby, and I will always be your mother!“
The End
“Mom’s Gone Fighting The Deaf Wars” – Chpt. 26
This is a blog serial – so please read the preceding chapter if you haven’t done so yet. To see the list of characters, please refer to the Preface post.
The settlement agreement was finalized in April 1995. I was standing in this very room where I’m writing this blog, when Mom came up to me and said, “It’s over. We got the settlement, and got what we wanted.”
The only response I had was a nod of my head. I could scarcely believe it was over. This had gone on from the end of sixth grade to near the end of tenth grade, which was an eternity for me.
In the settlement agreement, Mom had numerous things agreed upon. One was the procedure of how to complain when we had issues. There was the financial component, which is confidential. And the major part of the agreement was that Northview had to hire Dennis Cokeley, an internationally renown expert on ASL and interpreting, to evaluate all of the interpreters at Northview, to determine which ones could interpret for me.
Cokeley was a research assistant under William Stokoe at Gallaudet, a co-founder of Sign Media, Inc, and a former RID president. This was a huge deal – Cokeley was truly an expert and extremely well known in the interpreting field. Mom had told her interpreter friends that Dennis Cokeley was coming to town, and that he would be having dinner with us that evening after evaluating all of the Northview interpreters.
One of her friends didn’t believe Mom, because who the heck that famous would show up to a mere peon’s house? So Mom invited the friend to stop by briefly and see for herself.
Cokeley and I were sitting around the dining table, waiting for Mom to finish cooking, when the doorbell rang. Mom said, “Oh, Dennis, would you please get the door?”
So Cokeley stood up and went to answer the door. He came back a moment later, looking confused. “That was odd. There was a lady at the door and when she saw me, she looked shocked and fled. What was that all about?”
Looking back, I’m impressed that Mom got Dennis Cokeley to do this. As a teenager, I had no idea who he was – just that he was supposed to be famous. But as a child, I had met famous people before, and none really impressed me because they were normal people. Nothing remarkable about them stood out to me. The only exception to that was Betty Colonomos but that wasn’t because of her fame. It was because she signed so gracefully, and I was so entranced watching her sign. I could watch her sign forever – I had never seen someone sign that beautifully before, and I knew that she genuinely cared about people.
Anyway, when Cokeley had finished his evaluation, nobody was really happy with his decision. He determined that the only interpreter that who could truly meet my needs was Ms. Marr. Both Northview and I objected – we didn’t want to be stuck with each other all day. So Cokeley relented and agreed to another interpreter who had just been hired that year, for a limited number of my classes. I now had two interpreters for all of my classes, and a majority of them was going to be interpreted by Ms. Marr.
The constant humiliation and harassment from Ms. Marr continued. It wasn’t until the following year in eleventh grade that Mom finally put a stop to the harassment for once and all.
It was near Christmas, and we had an annual Total Communication program potluck and performance by the students. A bunch of the staff and students were in the self-contained classroom, and we all were just chatting. Ms. Kalsbeek, who now was a teacher there at the high school asked me, “Jeannette, what do you think of having the ASL students participate in the performance?”
Ms. Marr lost it and she screamed at us, “Jeannette is only a student! How dare you give her that power or ask her for her opinion?! You are the teacher and you are in control, not her!“
Her face was contorted in rage. She was genuinely livid that a teacher had the nerve to ask me for my opinion. We all just stood there, stunned. I think that’s when Ms. Kalsbeek and most of the staff there finally admitted to themselves that my complaints about Ms. Marr was legitimate.
When I went home, I was furious. I was fed up with the constant outbursts by Ms. Marr. It was like she lived to crush me into a little obedient girl. I sat there and cried tears of rage, and I didn’t bother to quieten my sobs, like I used to. It was supposed to be over, and it wasn’t.
When Mom found out what had happened, she first called Kiley and they discussed what happened. Mom demanded that Kiley make Ms. Marr apologize and he said that after Ms. Marr’s apology in ninth grade, she swore she would never do another apology.
So Mom wrote a letter to Kiley. A very, very long letter confirming the conversation she had with Kiley and what had transpired that day in class with me and Ms. Marr. She wrote, “If a student had behaved like Ms. Marr had, that student would have been suspended for insubordination. Why is it that we hold students to a higher level of standards than we hold for adults? They are children, and they are learning how to behave appropriately. Ms. Marr is supposed to be an adult and she has zero excuse for her conduct.“
Then the next page was turned sideways, with the biggest font that could fit on that paper, and it read, “NEVER AGAIN!“
Mom said that if she heard me complaining about Ms. Marr ever again, she would ensure that Ms. Marr’s RID certification was removed permanently.
Ms. Marr apologized and that’s when the harassment and constant humiliation finally ended.
My senior year was the best year in high school. Ms. Marr behaved herself, and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. No complaints were filed that year.
During graduation, when I walked across the stage to receive my high school diploma, the person who shook my hand wasn’t the principal for most of the other students. It instead was Dr. Oldt, the superintendent, who shook my hand. I couldn’t help but think as Dr. Oldt shook my hand on the stage, “Damn. They must be really happy to see me go.”
As my friends and I posed for pictures, the other interpreter I had, approached Mom. She and Ms. Kalsbeek had been invited to my open house party, since they were the only two that complaints weren’t filed against and whom I liked as well.
The intepreter said to Mom, “Celeste, I realize Jeannette and Ms. Marr did not always get along. But can’t Ms. Marr be invited to the open house like Ms. Kalsbeek and I were? Ms. Marr loves your daughter and she wants to be part of this celebration.”
Mom gave her a stony gaze and said, “No. Ms. Marr is not going to be part of this celebration. Ms. Marr makes my daughter sad, and I cannot have that at the celebration. Jeannette needs to celebrate and be fully happy. I cannot do that to my daughter. I cannot have her celebrating, then see a person there, who tortured her. No… Ms. Marr is not invited.“
The interpreter gaped at Mom in disbelief. She couldn’t believe that Mom said that with Ms. Marr within earshot distance. Mom told me later that as we walked away, Ms. Marr just stood there, looking stricken.
I never saw her again.
